Friday, September 29, 2006

chasing/vandalizing cars

my whole world has been rocked by a revelation from ben.
Snow Patrol's "Chasing Cars" is about a DOG. think about it. only dogs chase cars.
i really really liked this song. it made me all wistful. but now, i can only think of dogs, and i really don't like dogs.

if you don't believe me, check out these lyrics:

"If I lay here/If I just lay here/Would you lie with me and just forget the world?"
you have to imagine a big golden retriever all nuzzled with its owner

"I don't quite know/How to say/How I feel"
that's because you don't speak dog.

"Forget what we're told/Before we get too old/Show me a garden that's bursting into life"
of course he's worried about getting old. dog years! and that garden is where poochie buried his bone.

on an unrelated note, but oddly related, here's a little story from "the mall adventures of ali"

i was parked in a typical suburban parking lot. i get back to the car, and this dumbass odyssey is parked with its front fender facing mine (nothing unusual). until you get closer and realize that the fender isn't just facing, but it's touching.

for some reason, this INFURIATED me. i mean, if you're a bad enough driver that you're going to hit my car while going FORWARD, then you can at least back up 2 inches to pretend you didn't hit my car. not surprisingly, this woman had huge scrape marks on both sides of her front fender, as if she clipped a couple cars (i repeat, ON BOTH SIDES) while trying to get out of a parking spot.

now you'll notice that i've already determined that the driver of this minivan is a woman. i'll say it, only a woman could do this much damage to her car, and only a woman would bump fenders and NOT move back. she probably didn't even know.

but the REAL point of this story is to tell you how hilarious i am. b/c instead of just shrugging it off (remember, i was infuriated), i wrote a friendly note and left it on her windshield. it went something like this:

"wow. you must be the worst driver ever. thanks for the tap on my front bumper. p.s. nice work on the sides of your fender. bitch."

ok, so i didn't actually write "bitch" b/c i was worried it was an old chinese lady (which was likely). but in some ways, i really wish i did.,

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