the drama of intermediate coed volleyball
adding to the list of people i've emotionally ravished with painful honesty is volleyball captain dan, whose temper combined with lack of skill led to the displeasure of many and the revolt of just as many.
the full story goes something like this: i joined a craigslist volleyball team in january. it was all fine for about two games, when i realized dan was a total terror on the court. there is yelling (me) and then there is what i'd like to consider unproductive yelling (him). while members of my former coed IM team would probably disagree with positive assessment of myself, i think the consensus is that dan sucks.
anyway, after 3 seasons of despondent wins (yes. i was stressed out when we WON), maggie and i decided we were quitting the team and starting our own. we decided to stay in the same league and find players via craigslist.
none of this story is that extraordinary, except then we ran into not-arguably the best player on our team. he asked if we were playing vball in the fall. we sheepishly said yes, but not on dan's team.
his eyes lit up.
him: "do you have room on your team?"
us: "what? you wanna join"
him: "YES. i hate dan."
us: "um, OF COURSE."
him: "and actually, kristin (another player, obv) will want to join. and maybe charlie."
us: "HOT DAMN"
ok. so we didn't actually say "hot damn" and we didn't say everything in unison. but you get the gist.
that makes 4 people on this new team from the old. OOPS. we didn't bother asking anyone else on that team because they were all friends from the old days, and we assumed pretty loyal. until ...
we get this email:
he QUIT volleyball. not just this team, but the sport. it's like part of him died inside.
in short, we totally broke the man. and i'm proud of it. our "new" team has only 1 person who is actually new. our team name is "hot mess." the metro sports leagues will have no idea what hit them.
the full story goes something like this: i joined a craigslist volleyball team in january. it was all fine for about two games, when i realized dan was a total terror on the court. there is yelling (me) and then there is what i'd like to consider unproductive yelling (him). while members of my former coed IM team would probably disagree with positive assessment of myself, i think the consensus is that dan sucks.
anyway, after 3 seasons of despondent wins (yes. i was stressed out when we WON), maggie and i decided we were quitting the team and starting our own. we decided to stay in the same league and find players via craigslist.
none of this story is that extraordinary, except then we ran into not-arguably the best player on our team. he asked if we were playing vball in the fall. we sheepishly said yes, but not on dan's team.
his eyes lit up.
him: "do you have room on your team?"
us: "what? you wanna join"
him: "YES. i hate dan."
us: "um, OF COURSE."
him: "and actually, kristin (another player, obv) will want to join. and maybe charlie."
us: "HOT DAMN"
ok. so we didn't actually say "hot damn" and we didn't say everything in unison. but you get the gist.
that makes 4 people on this new team from the old. OOPS. we didn't bother asking anyone else on that team because they were all friends from the old days, and we assumed pretty loyal. until ...
we get this email:
Dan has quit volleyball—and Jay and I no longer have a team to play with. We heard you guys formed a new team. Do you need players?
he QUIT volleyball. not just this team, but the sport. it's like part of him died inside.
in short, we totally broke the man. and i'm proud of it. our "new" team has only 1 person who is actually new. our team name is "hot mess." the metro sports leagues will have no idea what hit them.
posted by alison at 17:34
3 Comments:
Yeah, former victim of Ali's volleyball court wrath here to testify against her claims of "productive yelling." God, I hate to think of the awful things you said about me and my underhand (which I'm still ashamed about, okay?).
Our whole situation kind of makes me feel like we are the munchkins in the Wizard of Oz singing "Ding-Dong the witch is dead!" For most people, qutting volleyball would not be the same as a house falling on you, but I think for Dan, it is that serious. I wouldn't be surprised if he has ruby slippers too... Too soon?
wow, you love Craig's list huh????
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