political round-up: the fabio love edition

i don't really like writing about politics, but it'll be hard to avoid in the upcoming weeks. first on the list today is news about political endorsements.

fabio endorses hillary clinton

"She's so smart. And with her, you're getting two with one. You know I love women, because I owe my success to women. To me, it will be the biggest reward. I would love for the first time to have a woman president."
And with Hillary in charge, he says, the Iraqi insurgents better watch out. "When a woman gets pissed off at you, she's going to get you, you know?"

wow. this is really big.
i just wonder if he will have the same effect on her numbers as he did with fake-butter sales. If obama has oprah (alliteration, how cute) and huckabee got karate chopped in a good way by chuck norris, then hillary needs some comforting too.
as long as the pectorally-gifted man stays away from roller coasters, i think she'll be all right.

but let's talk about something serious. the michigan student assembly (umich's student government) has found itself in ANOTHER scandal. some background: this is the same organization that had 2 people arrested for computer tampering during an apparently successful election fraud campaign and also forced a rep to resign because he sent jerkface e-mails to some overachieving student and her mother.

The concerned mother's e-mail asked about the availability of activities on campus for students who don't drink or go to parties. Liner responded to the parent by suggesting that students who don't enjoy going to parties often join the Board Game Club or "masturbate in the stacks of the Shapiro Undergraduate Library."
Liner then e-mailed the student, writing: "I thought I'd let you know that your mom is destroying your life. Enjoy!"

the latest transgression seems to be the lesser of the three, but absurd nonetheless.
the MSA president created a secret facebook group that mocked a fellow MSA rep's asberger's syndrome.
the group was called, "I waste more time reading Tim Hull's code amendments than I do on Facebook," and in the description reads, "I'll give that kid a fucking disability he can write home about if he keeps sending these code amendments to everyone." the image "consists of the scribbled words, 'SHUT UP TIM!'"
here's a pic of the prez:


you think he looks like an asshole? well, you'd be right. he apologized, calling it a "crass, inappropriate joke."

"Tim, I'm sorry. I don't know what to say. I'm an asshole."

but the story only gets odder, since the person who outed him was also in the facebook group, yet is coincidentally running for MSA again next year, but under a party he is starting himself. dude, as lame as the daily was, MSA proves time and again that they are much, much more lame.

and 40 minutes later, i'm done writing this post.

chickensh*t

nope, not the guy who stands on the "walk" side of an escalator. rather, it's a story about turning chicken poo into electricity! north carolina apparently has an abundance of the stuff, and it's causing "environmental distress." they should just ship it to their neighbors. it's what canada does to michigan.

"we may experience some turbulence"

so quoth the pilot on both flights to and from michigan, as he woefully informed us that the bumpy ride would also mean no in-flight drinks. something about the safety of the flight attendants and big rolling carts. i just think the airlines are looking for any excuse to cut corners and stay afloat, figuratively speaking, of course.

instead of drinking delicious watered-down cran-apple, i assumed the always attractive middle seat position: wall street journal placed strategically on my lap, head cricked back, leaned on some rolled-up t-shirts, with my ladylike mouth dangling open. i just hope i didn't snore.

this is seriously gross

read on to find out what this grotesque pic is about:

nip/tuck fans out there? anyone?

i just caught the third episode of the 5th season (and i can't believe this show is still on), and i'm basically appalled by what these writers think is character-driven plot. FX's insane marketing campaign for the show was hardly subtle and, of course, worked on me, but i'm having a hard time relating to these characters. examples:
1. julia (mother figure) is permanently over sean, and is now a lesbian hooking up with portia di rossi. is it just me or has portia been a lesbian in something else? i digress.
2. matt, the 20-ish year old son of julia and sean/christian (paternity test, blah blah), is now crack buddies with kimber, who is a little under twice his age, used to hook up with both his dads, and has had comparable amounts of plastic surgery to joan rivers. oh yeah, they also have a baby together. they also have dirty drug-fueled sex on kitchen floors while their baby cries nearby. oh yeah, and he's actually a 30yo actor who is balding, and i have to say, it's pretty gross.


3. looks like christian is about to become a male escort.
4. and, the most normal of the group, sean, is dating a bulimic actress who just had gastric bypass surgery, hates her body, and took a dump in a hot tub. he is also being seduced by his ex-wife's girlfriend's 19yo daughter, who looks nothing like portia di rossi. then again who cares about details? nip/tuck doesn't!
did i mention that between all these "plot points" there are at least 15 minutes of ridiculous sex scenes? naked bodies and melodramatic O faces left and right.
needless to say, i'll be watching next week's episode. i'm ready to throw in the towel with numb3rs (it's about math! i thought i'd give it a chance), and i grow weary of a handful of other shows. plus college football is wrapping up, so i'm going to have a bit more time on my hands over the weekends. simultaneously sad and hopeful.

the world is pathetic

this story about a girl who committed suicide after her non-friend's parents (and friend?) harassed her online, calling her fat and a slut, is probably one of the most depressing stories i've read in a while. what the hell.

there has also been a subsequent controversy of whether the local newspaper should have released the names of the offending parties (they didn't). i usually side with the course of caution (say no to libel)--especially since, by reporting their names, the paper is also putting a big bullseye on this "family." in any case, bloggers figured it out, and you can send your hatemail after going to this site.

the 12yo trapped within

i know i'm not supposed to blog about work stuff, but this is too good. we just got a new IM client to chat with coworkers (about work stuff, obviously ...), and as i was trying to fiddle with the settings, i got this error message: "Server does not support VCards. Unable to save your VCard."
that's seriously hilarious. whoever wrote that message probably thinks he's the funniest person in the world. and i agree.

jill of all trades

my schedule for the next couple days.

tonight: (hopefully) going to the michigan/georgetown basketball game at verizon center
tomorrow: fancy dinner and (hopefully) box seats at the kennedy center to see the national symphony orchestra (shostakovich and rimsky korsakov? sweet!)
saturday: flag football extravaganza, then likely drinking after
sunday: more flag football, some kickball, some drinking, then family din din time
monday: volleyball

i am a sports dynamo, with a little high culture thrown in there. add that to my intense tv watching habits, and we'll call that a LIFE.

taking into account my love for cats

and all of god's mongrels, this story about a guy who killed a cat to protect birds makes me laugh."If convicted on animal cruelty charges in the shooting last November, he faces up to two years in jail and a $10,000 fine."
two years? really? while i can't say i approve of his methods (did anyone make the comparison to people who bomb clinics to stop abortions), animal cruelty laws are clearly out of control. anyone suddenly feel like eating steak?

once you go tivo, you can never go back

i wish that rhymed.

some interesting correlations among the shows i watch:

1. i'm a little sick of the "i'm a superhero/spy/devilworker, so i can't tell my friends/family about it, but i'm going to act really awkward and get torn up about it." i am, of course, referencing reaper, pushing daisies, heroes, and bionic woman (which i no longer watch. meh). all these people need to let their secrets out and get over it.

2. what's with all the people named chuck? chuck from chuck, chuck from pushing daisies, and chuck from gossip girl. just kind of weird.

3. what's with the sidekicks in chuck and reaper? at least in reaper, they help him capture evil souls, but in chuck, they are absolutely worthless. i literally fastforward through all the parts with those bozos and their antics. (love tivo). speaking of chuck and reaper, why are they both awkward underachievers who work at electronics stores on steroids.

4. not really a correlation, but gossip girl is still the best new show of the season. that is all.

separated at birth?

is it just me, but does this pic of eli manning look like john krasinski from the office?




mommy, why is the guy from license to wed wearing a giants jersey?

knives don't kill people ...

the fbi says that more college campus crimes are committed with knives than guns.

should the NRA eat this up? of course not. the reason why people love using knives to inflict harm is b/c they are so easily accessible.

more proof that i'm right: the most commonly used "weapons" for violent crime were fists and feet. i'm going to go join the limb control lobby. it's not even in the 2nd amendment.

gmail interface update

anyone else notice the changes gmail made yesterday? most of them i like, but i also have gripes.

likes:
the contacts box looks so much better now. if you roll your mouse over the names, the popout that you get just looks more professional. nice work.

also, i like how you can roll over names in emails themselves and get a little popout box too. i think i'm calling these boxes by the wrong name, but whatever.

when you archive or label messages, the alert box is now a more mellow shade of yellow. that mustard color wasn't really working for me.

dislikes:
now the header reads "Gmail - Inbox - ________@gmail.com," where before it just read "Gmail - Inbox." i liked this uncluttered look much better. why do i need to know my own email address? when i have a bunch of tabs or windows open, i don't want to look at more letters than i already have to see.

the drop down for labels now has a scroll bar. i liked when the drop down just showed all the choices you had. i hate scroll bars, especially if you don't have a mouse w/ a scroll button (such as my wireless mac mouse). maybe you don't notice, but i do, and it sucks.

overall though, design tweaks aren't a bad idea. there are more, but they aren't worth discussing. did i mention gmail rocks?

denim blazer: have you seen me?

i am super upset right now b/c i lost this great denim one-button blazer. i think it was stolen out of my office at work, and i really want it back. it sort of looks like the one above, but this sweet dark rinse color. i'm near tears at this point. if you've seen this lost child, please return to owner.

as i mentioned before, i also lost my camera at the high heels race. this is not a good month for my stuff.

conspiracy theory: jews are taking over the media

back to fall tv. i've noticed a popular character trend this season: the geeky, awkward, jewish (or jewish-ish) adam brody/seth cohen type. i will list:

1. chuck from chuck. i haven't actually watched any episodes yet (saved on tivo, the best decision of my life), but he seems like the prototype
2. the spy/future bf from bionic woman. jordan bridges might not actually be jewish (he's apparently the grandson of lloyd bridges and nephew to jeff bridges), but whatever, i'm not going for accuracy here.
3. ned from pushing daisies. so i'm pretty sure lee pace is also not jewish, but he has the same jerky and anxious seth cohen thing going on. plus he spent time in saudi arabia b/c his dad was involved in oil production. probably not a jew ...
4. sam from reaper. is brett harrison jewish? i don't even know what to think anymore, but he is adam brody's real life roommate. see how it all comes full circle?

so this was a terrible list of half-truths and possibly racist stereotypes, but maybe the real trend is that the seth cohen character, who just happens to be half-jewish, has become popular by proxy. if it worked for the oc, it'll work for everyone.

speaking of the oc, its creator also launched gossip girl, one of the few shows i watch that DOESN'T have that guy in it. weird.

the atlantic monthly: if you don't like reading, don't read this magazine

the atlantic monthly is actually one of my top 5 magazines, so this guy whining about how it's going downhill since it moved from boston to DC is somewhat annoying. (i like this quote: "Top-100 lists, graph metastasis, Aspen Institute–ese . . . what on earth is going on here? Is the Atlantic’s move to DC transforming it into a supersize U.S. News & World Report?")
i don't really have much to say about it's editorial trajectory (only started reading it about a year and a half ago), but i do like his description of boston:

When the Atlantic was founded 150 years ago, Boston could lay legitimate claim to being America’s cultural and intellectual capital; it was also a center of finance. This same national eminence made it natural for the Atlantic’s founders — a high-powered group that included Ralph Waldo Emerson, Oliver Wendell Holmes, and Henry Wadsworth Longfellow — to imbue their new publication with an explicitly national focus.
By the end of the Atlantic’s Boston tenure, things had changed: the city was becoming a branch town in almost everything but academia — and there, too, our supremacy was on the wane. Still, with cultural and financial gravity concentrated in New York and political power concentrated in Washington, Boston had cultivated something else: a kind of shared civic arrogance, rooted in memories of past glory, that drove Bostonians to sit in intellectual judgment on the great events of the day — events which, by and large, were no longer happening here.

is the atlantic becoming exceedingly wonkish because of its new home in DC? maybe. does that make it one more voice in the echo chamber? maybe. but in the end, it's still a great mag that has permanently changed many of my political views, and if i may anthropomorphize the publication, i can definitely relate to its dc transformation.

isn't it ironic?

a story about how it's hard to find coca cola at ohio university b/c of the school's pervasive pepsi contract has this headline:

It's like 10,000 Pepsis when all you need is a Coke

just like the entirety of that alanis morissette song, it's not actually ironic, but it's still clever. kudos to whoever wrote it.

i love john kitna

why again, are people so upset over this costume? just b/c he's making fun of a lions assistant coach, who was earlier arrested for obscene conduct and drunken driving (for going through a wendy's drive-thru drunk and naked), doesn't make kitna a bad guy. in fact it makes him hilarious.

i also like how the story points out that he is both a prankster and a devout christion. "jesus loves you! pull my finger ..."