Monday, April 16, 2007

the weakness of man

a weekend spent with M. Cooper Forster (thanks for the post title) has confirmed why optimism for mankind is generally foolish.

1. wicked car accident on the walk home from the bar saturday night. i can't find any record of it online, but some presumably drunk dudes ran a red light and smashed into a taxi full of people. i didn't see the actual contact, but i was able to turn around fast enough to see the SUV catch some air and spin around almost 180 degrees. that dude ran that red no less than 30 seconds after i crossed the street. fuckers, you better have been sucking pennies while you waited for the cops. i talked to the three passengers in the cab, and they were ok. they were also apparently coming from some goth/s&m event. all were decked out in skanky black clothing, covered in purple glitter, and wearing black fishnet tights. the more fat one was wearing this awesome patent leather corset with her boobs janked up to HERE. this was not a hot look, but it was sort of awesome.

2. according to coop, someone shat some stinky poo in the urinal at the bar. how exactly do you do that (do you have to be tall?) and more importantly, why? we did have a decent view of the people walking in and out of the bathroom, and the expressions mostly went something like this:


3. and the biggest travesty of all. I LOST MY PHONE. let's ignore for a moment the fact that i am partially to blame, but rather focus on how much people suck. i have no idea where i misplaced my phone, but someone did find it and also acknowledged that they had it. Will, an intern at work, texted me to find out where i would be, and subsequently had this exchange with finder/bastard via text:

Will: what's going on?
Ass-hat: Ur loser friend lost his fone & im waiting 4 him 2 call it.
W: What loser friend? i talk to like 6 people at the office.
AH: The loser u just texted.
W: I texted alison. last time i checked, shes not a he.
AH: OK, he, she lost their fone.
W: Ok, well have her tell me when she gets her shit together.
AH: I am not the operator.
W: Ok, can u email alisongo at gmail dot com and tell her u have her phone?
AH: I can't till monday. U should.

observations about this conversation. 1) will was clearly confused, perhaps abusing certain legal substances. 2) this guy is a total shithead, and i can be sure i'm not getting my phone back. 3) what LOSER doesn't have e-mail on the weekend? maybe that's why you're so bitter and mean.

this could be worse than the time someone answered my lost phone and when asked how i could get my phone back, said, "this isn't your phone anymore. it's mine. CLICK"

this is clearly what hannah arendt meant when she coined the phrase "the banality of evil," except on a much smaller scale than the holocaust. GOOD people don't pick up stray phones because they assume it will find its way home by itself or that someone else will take care of it. EVIL people pick them up to steal or cause trouble. for a while now, i pick up any stray phone or wallet knowing that i'm a better person than most. lesson: pick up lost items and make the world a better place.


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